Trip Journal: DAY ONE --- 24 May 2010

            The Lufthansa yellow and grey theme colors aren’t very appealing to me. I’ve been sitting on a plane for about six hours, now. I studied some Hungarian earlier and then spent five hours trying to fall asleep. What a failure. If I slept at all, it was only for one of those hours. I don’t understand why airplane seats are so uncomfortable. Then again, it coould be my own fault. I’m reluctant to push my seat back into the reclining position because I don’t want to cramp the person behind me, because I don’t like when jerks in front of me push their seats back as far as possible, and then I don’t have any room for my laptop or other paraphernalia that I probably won’t use but like to keep around on flights just in case.

            I would have written sooner, but it was so dark here that I didn’t want to be the only asshole with the light blaring from the ceiling. Melvin and I have about an hour and a half left to fly, and thankfully it’s been a smooth journey so far. Hopefully everything will go alright with our connecting flight and when we get to Vienna, we’ll find András in the airport without a hitch.

            Tea time!

-Cd

Back In the New York City Groove

Hey everyone! Writing on May 1 didn't pan out, because I ended up going to Hungary in May and I stayed until June 15! It was an incredible time, and I'm going to slowly type up my travel journal so that you can all share in my experience. For now, I've been back a week, and I'm currently working on another article for amNewYork, as a freelancer, although I do need to look for a real, steadily-paying job at the same time. Really, I just wish I could move to Hungary and write my novels, but I guess I can't do that until I've got money. So, I'll be writing more regularly again, starting with posts from my travel journal. Hope everyone is alright; I missed you guys! sitting on a railing in the duna river part five you grabbed my hand and we were frozen like a photograph in which viewers would never know if you were puling me in or i was helping you out

Last Post Until May 1 - Hiatus

Dear all: I know. I've been absent. I lament. But unfortunately school is way too stressful right now, along with trying to figure out what I'm doing after college, managing an internship at amNewYork newspaper, and planning a trip to Hungary for the end of May / beginning of June. Classes end April 30, so I promise I will be back by May 1. Until then, peace & love to all, and I hope this finds you well. I've included some poems as well as an article I wrote in this post. ^_^ Chris TEN PLUS Never been recorded, and the equivalent seismic energy yield remains unknown. The world wakes after a million years: tree roots dangle like loose teeth and rivers overflow like mucus from the Bartholin's gland. Sign your name on my arm before the power goes out so you can find me in another million years. Phone lines are static, Timmy won't last long, and death lurks all around us. Kiss me, because these tremors only shake the ground -- they can't hurt you if you're floating. ------------------------------------------------ THE MISTAKEN SPECTRE It starts at the bottom of a cup stained purple and black with paint and travels in the mouth of the wind vibrating with molecular restraint. It stops in cities lost under water quivers in decrepit ancient tomes then flits through incantations whispered in the gloam. You grab it up in the morning while your lover stays in bed but you lose it in those farewells that you wish you'd never said. --------------------------------------------------------- NEITHER OF US WILL BE TOUCHING MOONSHINE For weeks there wasn’t a thing to say, just pavement aching into the horizon and these old Nikes starting to bite into the side of my right foot. Woke up curling next to hopelessness and picked a recipe from the Great American just to keep occupied. Kid – if you know it’s just a pipe dream why do you still cry? Loose yourself on fake islands, stare at trees and find shapes in branches, translate the whispers of your grief into Hungarian poetry. It’s not enough, to swim in halfway frozen lakes or hike to Ohio. You know the best plans are always the ones you don’t make. -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Making My Way Back...

Not a long post, but I wanted to share an article I wrote that got published in amNewYork newspaper here in the city. Anyone a fan of Tim O'Brien? (sorry its kind of fuzzy. I wrote those listings on the side too!)

Codified & Pre-determined

People unravel backwards, different from ribbon unrolling or rules carved in stone; with us, it starts in the core, a burning itch in the marrow, and spills out sloppily from the bones, breaking free of ligaments and neurotransmitters, and bursts through muscles in aerobic respiration, and squeezes out of skin like blood seeping from under nails. It grows in the heart and ages in the stomach, finally left to rattle behind emaciated ribcages like an acid-spewing fang-bearing beast, or Barabbas shaking the bars to be set free, or wind wildly gusting at a loose window in the not quite silence of the city night.

Here Goes Nothing, Or Everything

Well, it's over and official. We've broken up. I am, as expected, a mess, and trying to study for a midterm that I have to take tomorrow. Not really a good combination. Please wish me well, if you get a spare moment, and I will return the favor. Will blog soon, after a proper period of studying, test-taking, relaxing, being sad, etc. Probably not too long, I can't not write.

Unusually Personal

It's that twisting, tumbling-stomach feeling. The one that makes you simultaneously want to puke and just curl up in a ball for hours unmoving. It's fear, and anxiety, and guilt, and sorrow. Stuck together like the wad of chewed gum gathering under desks and on subway station poles. I have a bad feeling about this, and it makes me sad. What can you say when someone tells you they don't know how they feel about you anymore? What can you say when, the day after you celebrate your 1 year anniversary, someone tells you they don't think about you when you're not around? That sometimes they'd rather be out than being with you? That they think you don't have in common (when you know that what they really mean is, you have everything in common except for the fact that they like to go out and drink/party and you don't)? I don't know. There's not too much I can say. Just left with this wrenching, roiling-stomach feeling.

Global Warming

Think it's over-hyped? Extremely worried about it? I'm uncertain about how disastrous I think it is, myself, but I completely agree with this video, and think everyone should watch it and pass it on. (Here's the link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zORv8wwiadQ)

Eat & Sleep Is All We Do

we substitute the fan's relentless hum for conversation while we sneak glances at each other over blue china like children peering under beds to check for monsters. stay awake, and the bogeyman can't scare you with those slick, acid fangs of Jealousy and the flat, flabby mouth of Greed, slobbering against the curving thigh of Mistrust, enticed by the aching wetness of Insatiable. we hold each other's bodies like chopsticks; we trade condiments instead of kisses. hand me that tube of mayonnaise. i'd like some salt for these fries. pass the relish, please. if only we could learn how to wake ourselves up.

Celebrating with Snowmen

The last post was #100 on this blog! Yay! Go me! To celebrate, I will post pictures of the snowman my dad and I just built outside in our backyard. I don't like the cold or the snow, really, but I do like building snowmen. It was a good way to kick off my birthday weekend! Check it out: